Nde ewo (Hello in Igbo) Lovey Doveys!!! my question today is are we programmed to fall in love?
i don’t know why, but i’m just feeling all lovey dovey right now! 
yet the funny thing is that i’m feeling this way alone. i know that second sentence may not be what you expected me to say, but gosh darn its where i’m at with it at the moment. lol. its true cause through all the first loves (yes, i say all cause you know we think every new love is the first love LOL), all the heartbreaks, all the “never agains”, all the “this is the ONE girl! ” and all the spine-tingling first kisses, the relationship that i find most fulfilling and dear to me is the one with myself. now don’t get me wrong, i love love and i love man-woman relationships, but there’s something about partner relationships outside of Self that just don’t do it for me.
Check it out….. so this is how it usually goes down. i meet this wonderful man, he’s got all the qualities that i’ve always dreamed about, he treats me like a queen (heck he calls me his queen), we vibe, we get aligned and really start to dig one another and then…. well that’s just it. and then what?
of course i’m leaving out the mind-blowing x-rated parts, but even after that then what? i’ll tell you what… i’m right back to one, me and i’ll tell you why. its because in the grand scheme of things this stuff is all so mundane and superficial. in fact, i think that we’re programmed to expect more than partner relationships actually have to offer, at least i see that as being the case from my perspective. i mean we’re programmed to expect a partner relationship to complete us, which makes no sense since there’s absolutely no way for another human being outside of yourself to have that much insight into every aspect of your internal needs without you telling them and without you knowing yourself. heck, I’M still figuring out who i am and what i need so i KNOW my man can’t possibly know. yet, it continues to be the expectation LOL.
then the programming doesn’t stop there. we’re also programmed to expect there to be this soul mate out there who’s just perfect for us. LMAO!!! now i gotta say that this is the funniest because even on my BEST day I’M not perfect for me! in fact, some days i get on my own damn nerves! and since our programming has us thinking that perfection is the ultimate, i guess my own imperfections will keep me from being fulfilled in partner relationships especially since, as i’ve just demonstrated, i’m so imperfect.
so according to my programming i guess I’ll never realize true love because the requirements are so unobtainable. however, the good news is that my standard of love supersedes my programming and such being the case, i’ll happily love without pie-in-the-sky expectations, purely and unconditionally, and with an open mind and an open heart because you just can’t program someone to love. more importantly, i’ll realize completion from the inside out thus mating my soul with Self and we’ll live happily ever after with the man of my dreams.
what about you? do you see that any of your views of love and relationships are the result of programming? do you believe that we are programmed to fall in love?
sunflower smooches!
